St. Peter was checking a long queue of new candidates seeking entrance to heaven. "Sorry folks, we are so full in here that only really tragic deaths are being considered at present"

"So,what happened to you ?" he asked the next man in line.

"Well sir, I suspected my wife of having an affair, so I went home early from work and searched our 25th floor apartment very thoroughly. Found no-one, but went on to the balcony and saw two hands clinging to it. I got a hammer and smashed the hands until he let go he and plunged to street below. Unfortunately a tree broke his fall and I could see he was still alive, so I went into the kitchen, dragged the fridge to the balcony and dropped it on him to finish him off. The exertion gave me a heart attack, and that's why I am here"

St. Peter admitted him and questioned the next man in line.

"Well sir, I lived on the 26th floor of an apartment block. I got drunk and fell off the balcony.
I was able to break my fall by clinging desparately to the balcony of the floor below.
This maniac smashes my hands with a hammer.
I plunged down into the street, but fortunately a tree broke my fall. Then this same maniac dropped a fridge on top of me as I lay injured in the street."

St. Peter admitted him and questioned the next man in line.

"Well sir, I was in this appartment block having a nice time with this woman when her
husband came home early from work.
So I hid in the fridge . . ."